He’s a widower. His wife passed away in “one of those accidents” a few years ago. He loves dogs. He loves the fact I love my dog. He had a dog that was a soulmate. His four legged partner passed away 247 days, 13 hours, and 37 seconds ago. His wife’s date of death isn’t mentioned.
Dog Lover wants to bring a nice bottle of wine to my house and drink it on the deck. I say it’s too cold. He says, that’s even better, because we can drink it inside around the fire. I tell him no. I don’t know him. He could stalk me, or harm me. Strangle me, and drag me up into the hills behind the house. He says he would never do that to hurt his reputation at this point in his life. Ummm – what about what about the effect on ME?
After eight text messages we compromise and meet half way between our homes. We compromise on the time too. He wants to meet at 5:00 I prefer 7:30. I tell him how about 6:00 and I will eat dinner before the date so he’s not pressured to buy dinner if he doesn’t like me.
We meet at a steakhouse that I’ve never been too. I stopped eating red meat when I helped to butcher a cow at 16. He likes the steakhouse because happy hour lasts all night. We each have a $5 glass of wine, and then split a second one. We are the only people in the bar. When he goes to the bathroom the waiter brings the bill. I leave it for Dog Lover to pay.
He asks if I’d like to meet his dog. We walk to his Mercedes, which has an enormous dog bed in the back and a dog the weighs around 70 pounds. I crawl in the seat. The dog is dying. The bedding smells dank. He puts his paw on my arm and looks into my eyes. Weakly lifting his head to cough. I rub his chest, he sighs. I kiss him on the top of his head. I want to stay all night listening to him breath.
Dog Lover stands out in the cold. He walks me to the car I turn my head to avoid his kiss. It lands on my ear. His lips are very dry.
The next day he sends an email – Do you want to go out this weekend? Do you think we have chemistry? No and no. Good luck on your search, and please take your dog to the vet.
Dog Lover emails me a week later for some help with AdWorks. He’s used it before, but just needs to calculate traffic and costs, and what key words to use, and how to manage the account. Ummm, the name of the product is AdWords not AdWorks, they have an excellent online tutorial, and I charge $100/hr for SEO advice.
I can’t remember at all what he looks like, I still pray for his dog.